Hermione's Furry Little Problem
by Titanic-fanatic
Summary: Snape is charged with making Wolfsbane potion for the Order and on top of that Minerva has deemed Miss Granger to be his assistant. But what if the potion were to go wrong? That would be interesting...
1. Catastrophe!

Catastrophe!

"So Slughorn has _agreed_?" Severus asked, actually surprised.

"Oh heavens no Severus" Minerva half laughed. The wizard was a wet blanket, it was common knowledge, ever dithering and never committing.

Snape huffed "Thought as much. So who have you found, _a student_?" he jeered.

With that Hermione Granger emerged from behind Minerva. Of course she would bring the golden Gryffindor. How unashamedly predictable. He almost expected more but his rather low regard for those around him often faced him with such results. He sighed. He sighed for himself, he sighed for his cause. It had been a month since Dumbledore had charged him with the task of brewing Wolfsbane potion for the Order. He had obliged, of course, what was one course of potion for each lunar cycle? A pittance of time to Severus. However, it soon transpired that Remus had a mission of his own, to recruit more werewolves.

This is where Severus had adopted silent umbrage.

This is where the beginnings of Severus' sleepless nights had begun.

This was the reason he was now being faced with the prospect of having to work with Miss Granger.

"Don't look so vexed Severus, you know she is more than capable. I daresay, as competent as you were with a cauldron at her age" Minerva snapped, taking him down a peg or two. His face was set in a combination of contempt and superiority that only his features could carry. Minerva hadn't expected it to make an appearance, she optimistically had thought he'd appreciate the assistance. How wrong she was. She arched an eyebrow that even he couldn't compete with.

Daring not to look at the heated witch Severus scowled at Hermione. Surprisingly she took the look with indifference, not biting._ 'How interesting'_ he thought briefly before having his attentions diverted back to reality.

"It's down to Albus, if you have any qualms, take them up with him" Minvera concluded, making for the door.

"Oh I have many a qualm Minerva and several reservations I wish to voice" he said after her, not raising it but allowing it to relay his resentment.

"He said you'd say that" she countered.

"And?" he asked, incredulously.

"He said _tough_" she stated, quite pleased with herself it seemed "Right, Hermione dear, I'll leave you here with Professor Snape. Thank you again for volunteering" she smiled, as though the disgruntled reception hadn't even taken place. She threw a shrewd look at Severus before disappearing out of his office.

He exhaled in exasperation, flickering his eyes from his colleague's exit to the young witch in front of him. Hermione looked as though she was struggling to maintain her amusement, opting to stare at the ground. His expression sobered and he cleared his throat "There will be no getting rid of you then" he resigned.

"No sir" she replied, meeting his dark and irate stare.

"Very well" he continued, switching from anger to acceptance. A little too quickly for Hermione's liking. She shuffled awkwardly as he spoke "Professor McGonagall said you volunteered?"

"Yes, sir" she answered.

"Hum" he sounded quietly, dubiously debating her motives "I was under the impression, after today, that you had been sent to test both my patience and my nerves. It seems I have to endure further; what merited me this unrelenting purgatory I shall never know"

He was of course referring to Potions this morning where the pair had been debating the use of lacewing fly in poly juice potion; what would be the best way to prepare it. The battle had been rather one sided, Severus having the upper hand as Potions Master. Hermione had held her own, persisting that it would be better powdered than diced. Oh how she had persisted. 10 points from Gryffindor hadn't changed her tune either. Severus grimaced at the memory of her incessant chatter, lost in his thoughts - neglecting to remind himself that she had made a valid argument. When he returned his gaze to the student he noted Hermione's sheepish stance shifted considerably, she was now purposeful and confident. Something Severus was more accustomed to confronting. It was like he was back in class again. He sighed to himself once more.

"I can leave, if you want, but I was under the impression that you had an extraordinary amount of wolfsbane potion to brew for Order members and not enough hours in the day to keep up with demand and perform your other duties. Or was I mistaken?" Hermione stated bluntly, as though failing to feign ignorance on purpose.

Severus straightened himself, giving her a passive look. She was right and he knew it. She knew it too. The triumphant glint in her eyes hit his with disdain. Unwilling to acknowledge he desperately needed help, be it hers or otherwise, Snape cleared his throat "I suppose that your assistance could prove of some use". Minerva was right, she is skilled, he'd be a fool not to allow her to help "Follow me Miss Granger"

Severus selected a volume from his desk drawer and set it out on the surface before her. The book opened itself to a familiar page, matching the break in the binding. Hermione surveyed it.

"This is a different method than what I have read about" she noted, eyes glancing over the neatly written words in black ink. She recognised it was his hand from her essays, nobody else could control ink in such a precise and elegant manner.

"Your powers of observation never cease to amaze me" he muttered, voice dripping with sarcasm.

She shot him a narrow glare from beneath her tendrils of brown hair and continued reading. He returned the favour curtly, lighting the cauldron.

The pair worked in sync, seeming to pass but not interrupt one another. It wasn't a pleasant silence but one of productivity. She'd finish chopping the relevant ingredient (this time without a debate thank Merlin) as he required it, she stirred the cauldron whilst he went in search of another. Severus wouldn't go as far as to admit he was impressed, he expected this much of Granger. He surveyed her for a moment, she was murmuring his instructions to herself, transfixed on the book. He poured in some liquidised bloodroot and dried lavender leaves, grabbing the vials from the box without a thought. He'd made the potion so many times now sight was hardly a necessity for identifying ingredients.

On doing so he finished powdering some silver and sprinkled it distractedly into the mixture, causing it to stop boiling and develop a placid metallic sheen.  
Hermione heard the simmering halt and peered into the concoction.

He observed her for a second, she was biting her bottom lip in that way which bated a question "What is it Granger? Spit it out" he urged, his usual impatience seeping through.

"It's just, it's beautiful, sir" she replied.

"Indeed" he agreed wearily, not having noticed it himself. Blinded by a need to keep producing inordinate quantities of the concoction did take away the awe the potion demanded. It was one of his finest feats after all.

"Last thing to add is a few Wolfsbane petals and it is complete" Severus instructed, handing a sprig to his student.

She plucked it swiftly and dropped them into the potion.

With that the potion fizzed a startling purple and dispersed into Hermione's face.

"Oh dear" he stated, not with a hint of remorse, more as a mundane observation.

"What?!" But all that came of it was a meow. Her feline eyes widened, not that she could tell, as she looked up to the now towering presence of her Potions teacher.

Severus smirked, crossing his arms "Miss Granger, cat got your tongue?"


	2. Cat got your tongue?

Chapter 2 - Cat got your tongue?

"Thought I'd never see the day"

She gave him a scathing look and attempted to jump on the stool beside him, hoping to close the intimidating distance. However, what transpired resulted in Hermione crumpled onto the floor, having missed her footing abysmally.

'_Whatever happened to cats always landing on their feet?'_ she huffed mentally.

He chuckled.

'_How dare he chuckle!'_

With that Snape scooped her up, much to Hermione's annoyance, and deposited her on his desk. She mowed bristling her fur and glaring at her Professor indignantly.

"You'll need a bit, more practice. Something that doesn't come naturally must be _distressing_" he sneered.

"You absolute _tosspost_!" she shouted, sounding a hiss.

"No need for profanities" Snape informed calmly, his gaze darkening with what she could have sworn was enjoyment rather than reprimand.

'_What? He can understand me?'_

"I'm sure you're familiar with legimency?" he said, as she peered up to him he tuttted "Of course you read a book on it" he snidely commented "It's a bit clouded but I can hear most of what you're attempting to say. Question is, what to do with you now?"

She didn't like the troublesome tinge to his black eyes, or the tone of his voice. It was a mischief that echoed shades of Harry and Ron back and set Hermione right on the edge of hysterics "_What_?! Take me to McGonagall or Dumbledore, or Madame Pomfrey you idiot!"

"Hmm, I could take you to Minerva" he mused, oblivious to her ranting as he paused "But potions are complex. I'm afraid you'll have to wait for me to brew an antidote, well, formulate one. I've never seem this before with Wolfsbane" he decided, seemingly enjoying the issue rather than being perturbed.

Hermione was now reeling with anxiety and irritation. She jumped off the table, with a little stumble, and stalked out the classroom with haste. Unimpressed and angry was an understatement.

It was only when she reached the dark corridor that was unfamiliar Hermione she realised how small she was; the statues were tall and foreboding to someone of her stature. Then she recalled that she was no longer a someone but a something. She was a cat. The whole world suddenly became overwhelming and she sniffled to herself, unable to stop herself crying. The prospect of being stuck like this indefinitely swelling up inside her, consuming all else.

* * *

Severus rolled his eyes as Granger vanished out the door 'Foolish girl'. He then emptied the offending wolfsbane potion into a vial for later inspection and cleaned down the desk before venturing through to his quarters for some much needed sleep. When entering his room, he spied the pyramid of essays he had due by morning and this plan dissipated. The essays sat on his private desk unashamedly and he flopped into his seat, taking up his quill and unravelling the first scroll reluctantly.

Time passed swiftly as monotonous essay after monotonous essay passed under his hooked nose, the candle on his desk illuminating the parchment. Severus felt as though this loathe some task would never end until he finally unfurled the final scroll. A smirk of slight relief twitched at his lips.

_Scratch_.

Severus focused on the words before him, the sound not entering his peripherals.

_Scratch. Scratch. Scratch._

Severus heard an irritating noise coming from Merlin knows where and returned to the paragraph he was reading.

"Meow"

It was a weak and feeble sound, coming from the door to his quarters. He lifted his gaze irately. It took a moment before recalling why he was hearing a cat at his door. On remembering the little brown ball of fur that had been his student he rose and walked over to the door. He opened it and looking outward before letting eyes drop to his feet. Hermione had dipped her head low, in defeat and possible apology; he couldn't quite decide after scrutinising her for a few seconds. He gave her a stone faced expression and blocked her passage, relaying his aggravation at her disappearance as she sniffled. Severus relented eventually, as her little cat ears flopped further, she really did look pathetic. Sighing for what he hoped to be the final time this evening, he stood back, silently granting her entrance to his chambers.


	3. Cat Nap

Cat Nap

Hermione sulked into the room, her pride having taken somewhat of a beating. It felt as though she'd given up before she had even begun to face her situation and it didn't help that Professor Snape happened to witness it. Of all the teachers it could of been it had to be the Potions Master from Hell. Well, at least he was being kind enough to let her in his quarters. This invitation was not extended very often, or so Hermione supposed. She revised her thoughts instantly, it wasn't kindness he was extending to her, McGonagall would have given him a dressing down beyond any other if she found out she was made to sleep in the potions classroom.

At this thought her little padded paws carried her across the flagstone and onto a brown threadbare rug. The room was dark, as she suspected, and a little on the cold side with a candle lit at his desk. The furniture was sparse, despite it leering over her new perspective. Aside from the desk it consisted of black leather sofa that had hardly been sat in, a bed in the far corner that also seemed unused, an unlit fireplace, an armoire and a couple of cases of vacant vials stacked in the corner. As far as Hermione could see, the room was as lifeless as the Potions Master was. She trod along cautiously, meandering around the sofa. It was then she spied several bookshelves packed with leather bound volumes and an armchair that was most definitely frequented, having an open book resting on its arm and a cushion pressed into its back. It seemed like the most comfortable place in the whole quarters, and the most occupied. At this a sound of chair legs dragging across the ground diverted her attentions.

Hermione tilted her head as she looked behind her. Professor Snape had returned to his desk with a flap of his robes as he sat. He resumed his marking, not saying a word. Hedging her bets, she leapt onto the sofa and then onwards to the desk. She could tell he had noticed her and was set not to give her his attention as his brow twitched. She meowed, walking bravely onto the essay he was marking and sat. Her face was rather close to his, uncomfortably so, but at least he couldn't ignore something that was right there under his atrocious hooked nose - or could he?

Snape glowered at her "I can't start brewing now, I'm sure you've realised it could be a temporary side effect and wear off" he informed bluntly. She gave a look as if to say _'how long?',_ lolling her head to the side "About three weeks or so and someone will have to observe you before working something out" he answered honestly, drolly.

Hermione sat there for a moment, any expression she gave couldn't quantify how much she wanted to contest the situation and so blinked instead. Grumbling in cat like murmurs she got off the essay and ventured to the nearby inkwell, a dip into Grindylow infested water was a better prospect in Hermione's view. All the homework she'd miss!

'_Stupid bludger of a Potions master' _she rued, her eyes like slits as she lay in a sphinx-like position, staring dead ahead.

Severus observed her, a hint of amusement plaguing the corner of his mouth "I've informed Albus and Minerva" he stated indifferently, scrawling a mark on the essay "They agreed to place me in charge of you"

_'Oh great'_ she pondered, letting her head flop onto her paws, looking very sorry for herself and resigning to her sentence as Snape's familiar.

"I'm not enthralled either Granger" he divulged, enchanting the essay back into a scroll and sending it to the completed pile by the door. At this he righted his desk into order looking forward to some sleep after a truly testing day. Slumping into his chair when he was done, Severus pinched the crook of his nose. He shut his eyes for a second or two before turning to his newly adopted issue.

Her tail was wagging back and forth as she slept. He raised an eyebrow at both he speed at which she had fallen unconscious and in contemplation. She was a rather pretty cat, as far as feline's went. However her charm as a familiar wore off on sighting the bushy tail, a tell-tale sign that it was Miss Granger; only she would have such an unruly addition of fur. He pursed his thin lips in thought, watching his student analytically.

After a few minutes Severus got up, alarming the exhausted cat. Hermione opened a singular eye to survey him in turn. He went to his dresser and vanished out the door with some bedclothes, or so she presumed. So this was it. She was stuck with the Potions Master for the best part of a month and there was nothing she could do about it. Aggravated, she stretched a shiver out of herself and made her way to the floor. It was so cold that all her hairs were bristling of their own accord, not that he noticed as he re-entered the room. He was like a blur of black, even in his pyjamas. It made Hermione question whether he had even changed clothes as he got into bed. As no sound was made for a few moments, she concluded that her sleeping arrangements were her own problem; it made sense, Snape wouldn't be one to offer her a bed of some form. She immediately decided there was no way she was going to jump on his bed and wake him for one, an even more irritated teacher was not something she wanted right now. Besides, she could do nothing about her situation, but at least she could make herself comfortable. A few seconds passed as she contemplated what to do. It was at this she began pawing the fire stoker, allowing the iron to clatter in dark. Without warning the fireplace was alight, causing her to tumble back on herself.

Severus readjusted his pillow, hoping that would sort the girl out, when he heard a shuffling. Curious, he peered over his shoulder and saw Hermione tug at a pillow with her teeth, dragging it onto the ground and before the fire. She was a determined little thing if ever he did see one. The familiar tenacity of the witch seemed to indicate that she was back to her logical self, for which Severus was grateful - it did aggravate him when people allowed their emotions to interfere with common sense. He yawned silently, losing consciousness somewhere between this thought and the warmth of the crackling fire.


	4. The Cat who got the Cream

The Cat who got the Cream

She looked at him incredulously. They had been locked in this stand off for the best part of half an hour now and neither was willing to relent.  
"For someone so attentive you seem to neglect to remember that you are a cat, Miss Granger" he pointed out, folding his arms into his robes. He may have been part of the reason she was not human, something which remained to be seen, but certainly would not have Minerva ranting at him for returning her favourite student malnourished. Was the little chit doing this to annoy him on purpose? He thought she had more sense in her after last night. Evidently he was mistaken.

'_Was that a compliment? If it was, by Merlin it was backhanded_' she scowled at her Professor in response. He continued to loom over her, watching and waiting.

"At least try it" he solicited "There is not much more harm that can come of you and I don't intend to poison you" he said adding a drawled out "I assure you"

For all his dryness Hermione believed him, there was a glimmer of truth in his stare as he spoke. With another pang of hunger erupting through her stomach she finally gave the silver saucer at his feet her attention. Approaching it in an anxious manner she sniffed it wearily, lowering her head as so her whiskers came into contact. Hermione pulled back, shocked and then resorted to looking at him one last time. He raised an eyebrow, petulant and expecting. _'Why was he so bothered anyway?_' Hermione reluctantly turned back to the saucer repeating to herself that_ 'This is so degrading' _as she poked her tongue into the cream. Lapping up a little she scrunched up her face '_It tastes good_' she admitted '_Drat!'_  
Unwilling to let him know he was right she shuffled around the bowl so she wasn't facing him as she drank, her tail swaying back and forth unwittingly.  
He smirked triumphantly, leaving her to her breakfast.

* * *

Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, Ron poured lashings of milk on his cereal, practically drowning it.  
"Where is she?" Harry repeated, keeping an eye on the doorway.  
"Look, she probably had breakfast already and has gone to Potions, or the library" he answered with a mouthful.  
"Hey Ginny" Harry asked, looking down the table "Did Hermione head off early this morning?"  
"Haven't seen her since last night" she replied.  
His brow creased with concern, taking a bite of his toast distractedly. Ron was probably right. It would be a first but stranger things had happened.


End file.
